Things That Are Radical: Heavy Iron and Whey Protein

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If you’ve been reading this site for any amount of time, and I do apologize for my year long hiatus; I had a rather unfortunate change of employment necessitating a total relocation and overhauling of my life. Readers who have read my site before my hiatus, not that there was anything much to read anyway, know that I’m all about things that are awesome and radical. My previous two entries, one on the greatest podcast of all time: The Joe Rogan Experience and the other on greatest movie of all time: Arnold Schwarzenegger’s Commando, both has one thing in common, testosterone and manliness. That’s what I’m all about, homies.

So to continue along with that theme, today I’m going to talk about something that by the title may seem far less radical than the previous two entries, but in actual fact is essential to the radicalness and awesomeness of the previous two! That’s right, folks, I’m talking about whey protein, which is a powder that is greater than cocaine and talcum powder combined. Why is it radical? Because in combination with an intense regime of lifting heavy iron, you can become as jacked as Arnold Schwarzenegger or Joe Rogan! Disclaimer: may take years.

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What inspired me to write this post? Well you see, in my year long hiatus, I discovered, or rather rediscovered, an old passion: the iron. And I don’t mean ironing my clothes either, that one I still hate. No brothers, I am referring here to the lifting of heavy iron, more specifically the discipline of powerlifting. In the past year I have been hitting the three main powerlifts: squats, deadlifts, and bench press more religiously than the pope attends Sunday mass.

Iron and protein go together like, um, the opposite of oil and water I guess. One cannot work without the other, after all the goal of lifting heavy iron is to get as strong as possible and build ginormous amounts of muscle and without protein your muscles just won’t grow! Let’s take a look at the basics: lifting weights causes micro-tears and abrasions to your muscles, and consuming protein allows your body to synthesize the amino acids (muscles are made of amino acids and protein consists of amino acids: BINGO!). From there your muscles get repaired except that your body repairs the muscle to be even stronger than before to get used to the new stress you placed upon it. Amazing!

Now, before any of you jump on my head over this, I KNOW that whey protein is not the only source of protein alright? I am well aware that ideally speaking, one would only get their protein from whole food sources such as meats, eggs, dairy, nuts, and vegetables. But guess what, I’m consuming over 200g of protein on a daily basis; just how much food do you expect me to eat? Just because I am doing powerlifting doesn’t mean I want to be those superheavyweight (read: fat as fuck) powerlifters whose full expression of athletic ability is waddling up to the bar and lifting admittedly humongous amounts of weights. No sir, I do like walking up the stairs without getting winded.

So given that I don’t want to consume massive quantities of food, which is never pure protein anyways, then protein supplementation via whey protein powders is the most logical and convenient answer. And before you rag on me about the cost, guess what, eating food is way more expensive and as long as you don’t waste your money on ‘super pure unfiltered tripled hydrolyzed whey’ bullcrap and just get a simple, basic, and cheap protein powder brand, your costs will end up much lower. Trust me on that.

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And to address the final point, I’ll have you know that whey protein powders can in fact be extremely delicious. Here’s a simple recipe for you plebeians: buy some overripe bananas at your local supermarket, which would likely be massively discounted, and then chop them up and throw them into your freezer. After they’re frozen put them in a blender together with some milk, creatine, and of course whey protein and blend the whole thing up. Result: a delicious and creamy high protein banana milkshake. Totally excellent after another beastly session hitting the heavy weights. It also works if you’re a fatty who wants to lose weight: this can then become an ideal meal replacement shake: high in protein with moderate amounts of fats and carbs.

To end this post I shall leave my readers with this mantra: Praise Brodin and Wheymen.

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Things That Are Radical: The Joe Rogan Experience Podcast

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The beauty of the information age is that it has allowed the proliferation of viewpoints and ideas from non-mainstream and unconventional sources. As the corporate-owned mainstream media gets less and less popular, particularly among Gen Y, podcasts have been increasingly popular, with the most listened ones becoming cult figures in their own right.

One of the most popular podcasts around today is the Joe Rogan Experience, henceforth known as JRE. Hosted by standup comedian / MMA commentator Joe Rogan, JRE began as just Joe and his standup comedian buddies (with the occasional MMA fighter) sitting around and shooting the shit. Copious amounts of the sweet herb (of which Rogan is an outspoken proponent of) is usually ingested by Joe prior to the podcast. Each podcast typically runs from 2.5 to 3 hours long.

As the podcast got more and more popular though, he started to bring in more high profile guests, who may come to the show, and the podcast gradually took on a more serious tone, depending on the guest of course. As it stands today some podcasts are entirely informative and thought provoking, with Joe going deep into various current topics, bordering on the philosophical. Of course, his old stand up friends are on the show frequently as well, and those episodes are simply put, just a hoot to listen to.

The great thing about the podcast is Joe himself; he is obviously of an independent mindset, not beholden to mainstream corporate interests, and unafraid to court controversy. Make no mistake however, Rogan is no ‘shock jock’; this podcast is clearly something Joe enjoys doing (it is one of the most prolific podcasts around with over 700 episodes to date), and he enters each podcast with a ‘learners’ mindset, always looking to see how he can expand on his knowledge and worldview from what each guest has to offer. It is this intellectual curiosity that makes the podcast such an enjoyment for me.

Here are some of my favorite episodes:

JRE #424 Brody Stevens

Joe riffing with (or rather riffing on) fellow comedian Brody Stevens is hilarious, particularly toward the latter half, centered around how gay Brody is (10% or 83%?) as well as his bi-curious experiences with transvestites in Thailand. Simply hilarious.

JRE #717 Steve-O

When people hear the name Steve-O, no doubt the mental image is that of an ignorant fool, too stupid to realize the danger he is putting himself through. That could not be further from the truth, as this extremely funny yet deeply insightful episode gives us a look at his unique thought processes, background, and life story that has made Steve-O the entertainer he is today. Make no mistake though, he’s totally crazy, but he is also highly self-aware.

JRE #670 Michael A Wood Jr

A socio-political episode. His guest is a retired Baltimore police officer who went into the force after the Marines. He offers an honest, no-holds barred insight into the inner workings of the police, touching on sensitive topics such as police brutality and institutional racism. A nuanced, thoughtful episode.

JRE #668 Jon Ronson

Best known for his book The Men Who Stare At Goats, which was also adapted into a film, author Jon Ronson shares hilarious and entertaining stories of his adventures with Infowars’ Alex Jones, including their infiltration of the infamous Bohemian Grove, as well as being followed by henchmen from the Bilderberg group. Highly entertaining.

JRE #666 Duncan Trussell

Any episode with Duncan devolves (or rather evolves) into discussions of altered states of consciousness and the use of psychedelics and isolation tanks. Good for the more open-minded listeners. Fans of Duncan can also check out his own podcast the Duncan Trussell Family Hour.

JRE #682 Mark & Chris Bell

For all who are a fan of powerlifting, strength training, and the use of steroids. Chris Bell was the director for the documentary film Bigger, Faster, Stronger, which was an island of objectivity in a sea of misinformation when it was released. He is on the podcast to promote his upcoming film Prescription Thugs, on the ills of prescription drugs, and details his and his family’s personal struggle with prescription drugs. Touching, informative, and undoubtedly funny at times.

JRE #583 Bill Burr

Another one of my favorite comics in the scene right now, it is obvious that Bill Burr and Joe Rogan have similar viewpoints in many cases, with Bill Burr’s angry ranting persona complementing Joe’s more laid back style. Bill has been on the JRE a number of times, and I recommend listening to all of them.

Those are just a few of my favorite JRE episodes that spring to mind as I write this post, I admittedly have only started listening to JRE as of a few months ago, so I have a lot of catching up to do.

If you guys have any favorite JRE episodes that you would like to share, comment below!

Things That Are Radical: Commando (1985 Film)

COMMANDO, Arnold Schwarzenegger, 1985 TM & Copyright (c) 20th Century Fox Film Corp. All rights reserved."" Courtesy: Everett Collection"

I don’t even know where to start with this one. Commando, starring the greatest film star of all time: Arnold Schwarzenegger, was made in 1985, after the release of the first Terminator movie as well as both Conan the Barbarian movies.

If I were to come up with an analogy for this movie, it would be something like The Pure Essence Of Manliness On Steroid Distilled Into A Super Concentrated Form And Shot Directly Into My Balls.

Fact: Watching Commando has been scientifically proven to increase muscle mass and testosterone levels in men. Females watching this movie have been known to get spontaneously pregnant.

Plot Synopsis

Arnold Schwarzenegger plays John Matrix (baddest name ever!), a retired Special Forces soldier living in the wilderness with his daughter (played by Alyssa Milano). He spends his time cutting wood and carrying tree trunks over his shoulder (presumably he built the cabin they live in), and feeding deer.

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Unbeknownst to him, a rogue member of his former team, Bennett, has been going around and assassinating his former team members. He tracks down Matrix and kidnaps his daughter, using her as blackmail in order to coerce Matrix to assassinate the President of Val Verde, so a deposed dictator can take his place. John of course complies and goes along with their plan because they have his daughter, right? WRONG!

He hops on the plane (accompanied by a goon) to the South American location, only to snap his neck and jump off a moving plane (Don’t disturb my friend, he’s dead tired). From there he begins the process of rescuing his daughter, amassing a triple digit body count along the way. The obligatory female support character (played by Rae-Dawn Chong) is picked up along the way.

What Makes This Movie Incredibly Radical

First of all, 80% of Arnie’s movies are totally badass. Yet even among the most badass filmography of all time, Commando stands out. It is a movie that is totally self-referential (without being explicitly, so like The Last Action Hero) and recognizes and amplifies all of Arnold’s movie strengths: the muscles, the one liners, the invincibility, the hyper masculinity, and the stoicism.

Arnold Schwarzenegger was fucking invincible in this movie, and I mean invincible. He was stronger and more durable in this movie than he was as the Terminator. He nonchalantly carries a tree trunk over one shoulder, jumps out of an aircraft mid-takeoff, sends 8 men flying through the air with one move, rips a car seat out with one hand, flips over a car, kills over a 100 men in under four minutes (including dismemberment and shearing off the top of a guy’s skull with a throw of circular saw), rips a steel pipe out of the wall and throws it through a man’s chest and into the wall behind. He was the 80’s Superman in this one, all glistening muscles and testosterone (he must have really kept up his protein intake on this one). Check out every kill he does in this movie.

And the one liners, oh my god, the one liners in this movie! This movie has the highest concentration of one liners that I have ever seen. Take a look at some of this classics:

 

Unnamed Bad Guy: We have your daughter, so you have to do what we say right?

John Matrix: WRONG! (Shoots the guy in the head)

 

John Matrix: Remember Sully, when I promised to kill you last?

Sully: Yes, John! You did!

John Matrix: I lied. (Drops him off a cliff)

Chick: What happened to Sully?

John Matrix: I let him go.

 

Cooke: This Green Beret’s gonna kick your ass!

John Matrix: I eat Greent Berets for breakfast, and right now, I am very hungry!

 

Or the classic finale scene:

John Matrix: Let off some steam, Bennett! (After impaling him with a steel pipe through the chest)

Just watch the compilation below:

Well, you guys get the picture. In short, WATCH THIS MOVIE.